testing

Humour For The Day

Porsche & the Singaporean lawyer‏

This is a good one....typical singaporean...lol

A very successful Singaporean lawyer parked his brand new Porsche Carrera GT in front of the office, ready to show it off to his colleagues.

As he was getting out, a truck came along too close to the car and completely tore off the driver's door.

Fortunately, a policeman was close enough to see the accident and pulled up behind the Porsche; it was completely ruined and would never be the same no matter how hard the body shop might try to make it new again.

His lights flashing, but before the policeman had a chance to ask any questions, the lawyer started screaming hysterically about how his Porsche, which he had just picked up the day before ,was now completely ruined and would never be the same no matter how hard the body shop tries to make it new again.

After the lawyer finally calmed down from his rant, the officer shook his head in disgust and disbelief. 'I can't believe how materialistic you lawyers are,' he said.
'You're so focused on your possessions that you neglect the most important things in life'

'How can you say such a thing?' asked the lawyer.

The officer replied, 'Don't you even realize that your left arm is missing? It got ripped off when the truck hit you!'

'OH, MY GOD!' screamed the lawyer.

'MY ROLEX!!!'

Phone Scam

Another one that came thru the mail. Ladies beware!!!

FW: Subject: Phone Scam

I cannot stop myself from sharing this with all of you.

Its all started when I received a call from someone claimed that he was Maxis asking me to shutdown phone for 2 hours for 3G update to take place. As I was rushing for a meeting, I did not question any shutdown my cell phone.

After 45 minutes I felt very suspicious since the caller did not even introduce his name. I quickly turned on back my cell phone back and I received several numbers of call; few numbers from my family members and the other numbers was from the number that call me before; 3954380.

I called my parents and I was shocked that they sounded very worry asking me whether I am safe. My parents told me that they received a call from someone claimed that they have me with them and asking for money to let me free. The call was so real and my parents even heard my voice crying out loud asking for help. My parent was at the bank waiting for next call to proceed for money transfer.. I told my parents that I am safe and asking them to lodge a police report..

Right after that I received again call from the guy asking me to shutdown my cell phone for another 1 hour which this time I refused to do so and hung up. They keep calling my cell phone until the battery run down.

I myself lodge a police report and was informed by the officer that this kind of scam always reported. MOST of the cases reported that the victim already transferred the money! And it is impossible to get back the money. Bank can only returned back the money if the owners of the account agree to do so or there is a court order.

Guys, be careful that this kind of scam might happened to any of us!!! Those guys are so professional and very convincing during calls. If you asked to shutdown your cell phone for updates by the service provider, ASK AROUND! Your friend should receive the same call.

Any Customer Service should introduce their NAME AT THE BEGINNING of the call. Ignore them if you don't get a name at the beginning of the call. If you received instructions from unrecognized number/person that you are not sure, make your own judgment. The BEST is DO NOT RESPONSE.

If you cannot pickup your loved one's call, DO GIVE A CALLBACK immediately! Update your loved one with ALTERNATE CONTACT wherever you are. If you think you are SMART that you cannot be cheated, You are wrong! Be Safe and Stay Alert!

I Believe In God

Another one that came thru email.

************************************************************

Do You Believe This???

A girl went to her friends house and she
ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone.

She wasn't afraid because it was a small COMMUNITY and she lived
only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the bike trail
Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger.

When she reached the alley, which was a shortcut to her house, she decided
to take it.

However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man
standing at the end as though he were waiting for her.

She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection.

Instantly acomforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her,
she felt as though someone was walking with her.

When she reachedthe end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived
home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper
that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty
minutes after she had been there.

Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to
weep.

Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young
woman, she decided to go to the police station.

She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story.

The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a line-up to see if she could
identify him.

She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she
had seen in the alley the night before.

When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed.

The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was
anything they could do for her.

She asked if they would ask the man one question.

Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her.

When the policeman asked him, he answered, 'Because she wasn't
alone.

She had two tall men walking on either side of her.

Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're not alone.
People will not stand up for God..

Send this if you truly believe in God....

PS: God is always
there in your heart and loves you no matter what:

'If you deny me in
front of your friends, I shall deny you in front of my Father'

**********************************************************************

He Deserved To Be Praised.

It's one of those days that I feel so blessed. I know I've been lamenting that I lacked true friends who are really sincere when you need some kind of support.

Looking back, I know my meeting with this friend altho not for long in way was not an accident. In God's kingdom, nothing is an accident, everything has its purpose.

I believe everything is going to turn far better than what I've expected. Over the years, I learnt never to depend on 'humans' but to trust the Lord, cos I know humans will always fail us. Yet, there are humans that God will use to bless others and I've found one such person. I'm so thankful to You , O Lord and for all the lessons I've learnt along the way.

Few Good Friends

You know you have only few good friends,
When majority just play lip service when supporting you.

You know you have only few good friends,
When majority promises to spread the word around but did none of that sort.

You know you have only few good friends
When majority actually envy you for what you are doing.

You know you have only few good friends
When none of them supported you personally in any way except nice words.

Sigh........now I wonder if I even have a few good friends.

Caution Women 2

This one came via email from a friend......How true I don't know but better be safe than sorry.

#####

A friend stopped at a pay-at-the-pump gas station to get gas. When she had filled her gas tank after paying at the pump and about to leave, the attendant inside came over the speaker.
He told her that something happened with her card and that she needed to come inside to pay.
The lady was confused because the transaction was completed and approved.. She told him that and was getting ready to leave but the attendant once again urged her to come in to pay or else.....
She proceeded to go inside and started arguing with the attendant about his threat.
He told her to calm down and to listen carefully:

He told her that while she was pumping gas, he saw a guy had slipped into the back seat of her car and hid on the other side.
He had called the police.
She immediately became scared and looked out there in time to see her car door open and the guy slip out.


The story went that it has to do with a test for the new gang initiation thing which requires one to bring back a woman's body part.
One way they are doing this is crawling into girls/women's cars while the target is pumping gas or at the grocery store at night time. Then, they will cut off the victim's legs/ankles to disable them in order to kidnap them, and later kill and dismember them.
The other method is slipping into unattended cars and kidnapping the women for the same purpose..


Please pass this on to other women, young and old alike.


Ladies, be extra careful when going into your parked car at night.


Do not park at lonely or secluded places at any time of the day for the sake of free parking!


If at all possible, don't drive alone at night!


This is real! Kidnapping! Murder! Dismemberment! These are all happening here in Malaysia !!!


The message:

1.. ALWAYS lock your car doors, even if you're gone for just a second.
2. Check underneath your car when approaching it for re-entry, and check in the back before getting in.
3. Always be aware of your surroundings and other individuals in your general vicinity, particularly at night!